Barrel's story
by Charon the Sabercat
Summary: Um... Barrel's started speaking French... and he can't stop... and this story doesn't make too much sense. Read and review, please.


Barrel's Story  
  
Synopsis: Oh no! Barrel's started speaking French!  
  
Disclaimer: Any kinks in the French language are not my fault, they are the fault of the AltaVista Babel Fish Translator. AND NOW, THE STORY WITH TRANSLATIONS!  
  
Jack and Sally had been looking for Barrel for days now. He was lost; dissappeared from sight a while ago. Lock and Shock were terrified. They were worried about him so much, it was unsettling. They hadn't stopped looking for him since. Some townspeople believed that Oogie's spirit had come back and eaten him...  
  
That wasn't the case.  
  
Sally heard a small sniffling noise coming from underneath Jack's staircase. She got down on her knees and removed the boards that had been nailed over the entrance to the crawlspace. She looked in to see-  
  
"Barrel!" She sighed. "There you are."  
  
"Laissez-moi seul!"  
  
Sally jumped. It was Barrel's body, but it didn't sound like him!  
  
"What did you say?"  
  
"Sstop b-bothering me!" It was Barrel's voice now, but it seemed strained and forced.  
  
"Come out of there, Barrel!" Sally called.  
  
"You found Barrel?" Jack asked.  
  
Sally backed out of the space under the stairs. "Yes, but I can't get him out."  
  
Jack bent down to Sally's level and called to Barrel. "Get out of there, Barrel!"  
  
"No!"  
  
"Barrel, there are spiders under there!" Jack called.  
  
"Araignées!"  
  
Barrel ran out from under the stairs and prompty bumped into Sally's lap. He broke into tears, sobbing uncontrollably.  
  
"Jacque! Sally!" Barrel hug dug his face into Sally's dress. "It's horrible! Je ne peux pas cesser de parler français!" He then started rattling off in French! Jack and Sally were lost, and they looked at eachother for answers. Nope, neither of them knew what was going on.  
  
"Barrel!" Jack finally stopped the boy. "Hush!"  
  
Barrel stopped his sobbing. He sniffled.  
  
"Now, tell me, in English, what you are doing here and why you've started speaking French all of the sudden."  
  
"I... came to hide... from Locqu- Lock and Shock." Barrel wiped his nose on his sleeve. "I th- thought they... would be mad because I talk French."  
  
"And why is that?" Sally asked.  
  
"Because... because I can't make myself stop!" Barrel sat down. "If.... if I don't try hard enough, I start to parlais Francois-" He yelled in torment. "Vou voyez? I- I don't wanna... not talk to Lock and Shock... teh- they're my fambley."  
  
"Well don't worry, Barrel." Jack patted Barrel's head, making the small boy feel better. "We'll find out what's going wrong."  
  
"Okay," Barrel sniffled again.  
  
***  
  
"DOCTOR!"  
  
"Dr. Finklestien?!"  
  
"Docteur Finklestien?"  
  
The wheelchair bound scientist rolled into view high above the three people's heads. Behind him stood his wife, Jewel.  
  
"What do you-"  
  
"Want, Jack?"  
  
Ah, the twin syndrome: A side effect brought on by Dr. Finklestien sharing his brain with his new wife. He thought of something, and he began his sentence. Jewel finished the sentence. They did this with whatever they said.  
  
"There's something wrong with Barrel," Jack resounded.  
  
"Je déteste cet endroit, Sally," Barrel tugged at Sally's cloth leg.  
  
"Why is Barrel-"  
  
"Speaking French?"  
  
"We don't know," Sally voiced, taking a tentative step behind Jack.  
  
"Je n'aime pas Jewel," Barrel stuck out his tongue. "Finklestien lui a fait le regard trop comme lui. Il regarde comme il épousait sa soeur."  
  
"Hmmm." Dr. Finklestien rubbed his head. "We'll see-"  
  
"What we can do." Jewel wheeled the Doctor into the lab. Jack followed, Barrel staying behind.  
  
"Je n'aime pas Docteur Finklestien!" Barrel squealed.  
  
"I think I know what you're saying, but I want you to start speaking like yourself again." Sally picked up the skeleton-dressed boy.  
  
"What do you think he's saying, anyway?" Jack asked Sally.  
  
"If only I knew," she sighed.  
  
"Il n'est rien gentil," Barrel laughed.  
  
***  
  
"We could find nothing-"  
  
"Phsycically wrong with him."  
  
"He must have been-"  
  
"French in an earlier life."  
  
Jack rubbed his head. He had never hated Doctor Finklestien as much as he did now.  
  
"Lock et Shock vont me tuer!" Barrel cried.  
  
"Maybe he just needs to talk it off," Sally guessed. "Let's go find Lock and Shock."  
  
Jack and Sally left without passing the couple another glance.  
  
***  
  
"BARREL!" Shock cried into the graveyard. It was far, far away from their Treehouse. It was so far away, in fact, the nearest tombstone was barely visible. The landscape was tan and dusty, not the pale gray of Halloween.  
  
"BARR-RREL!" Lock shook in his mask. "Where is he?"  
  
"He hasn't been home all night!" Shock collasped to the ground. "I'm hungry!"  
  
"And you thought it was a good idea to let Barrel hide the candy!" Lock scolded.  
  
"SHUT UP!"  
  
"Lock? Shock?" Sally approached the two children, Jack trailing behind her. "What are you doing here?"  
  
"Looking for Barrel," Shock weeped. "He used to come out here all the time and look for radishes."  
  
"Radishes?" Jack asked.  
  
"Yeah, and rocks!" Lock added. "And rabbits!"  
  
"He liked stuff that started with 'R'," Shock laughed sadly.  
  
"J'aime toujours la substance qui commence par 'R'."  
  
Lock and Shock's eyes suddenly opened wide, their mouths smiling brightly. "BARREL?"  
  
"LOCK!" Barrel ran out from behind Jack's legs. "SHOCK! Je ne peux pas nous croire vous ai trouvé!"  
  
"Barrel?!" Shock was surprised. "You're still talkin' funny!"  
  
"Yeah!" Lock clapped his hands.  
  
"Yeah?" Jack asked.  
  
"Qui?" Barrel was confused as well.  
  
"We like how he talks all funny like that!" Shock giggled.  
  
"Je vous ai pensé ne le voudrais pas!" said Barrel.  
  
Lock snickered. "You see? It's funny!"  
  
Sally smiled. "Well, I guess you worried for nothing, Barrel."  
  
Jack snapped his fingers. "I think I know who to call!"  
  
***  
  
Jack opened the door when he heard the soft knock.  
  
"Hello, Mr. Skellington," Charon smiled. Instead of her green t-shirt and camou shorts, she wore khaki pants and a long-sleeved white shirt with a "Disco Fever" decal patched onto the front. She held a spiral notebook and a mechanical pencil. Her hair was done in a loose, low ponytail which looked like it hadn't been brushed in ages.  
  
"Hello, Charon," Jack waved. "We need your help with Barrel. He's started speaking French, and he can't stop himself."  
  
Charon cocked her head, trying to raise her eyebrow but not really suceeding. "As in, he's learning?"  
  
"No, it just started up, as far as we know. Doctor Finklestien thinks he was French when he was alive, and it's started sort of a relapse."  
  
"Okay," Charon nodded. She tugged at the shoulder of her shirt. "I'll see what I can do."  
  
Charon kneeled to Barrel's level, holding her pencil ready. "Hi, Barrel. Remember me?"  
  
"Un peu." Barrel cocked an eyebrow, making Charon jealous of the ability.  
  
Charon started writing in her notepad, making small talk with Barrel.  
  
"So, Barrel, when did you start speaking like this?"  
  
"Il y a quelques jours."  
  
"Had you eaten?"  
  
"Oui."  
  
"What had you eaten?  
  
"Du chocolat et un radis," he regrettedly admitted.  
  
"Radis?" Lock repeated.  
  
"I think it means 'radish'," Charon explained. She was not even looking at Barrel anymore; she was totally focused on her notepad, not daring to stray an eye. She had rearranged herself so that she was sitting more comfortably, using her lap as a writing surface.  
  
"Hmmmm... do you like Devo?"  
  
"Qui?"  
  
"Have you ever heard of Devo?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Not surprised. They were kind of a one hit wonder. Okay, Barrel, are you the leader of the Boogie Boys?"  
  
"You bet I am! HEY! I'M SPEAKING ENGLISH AGAIN!" Barrel jumped up and down with joy.  
  
"YOU'RE BACK!" Shock screamed and hugged her friend.  
  
"YOU'RE BACK!" Lock also hugged his brother. The three had now formed a proverbial ring with their bodies.  
  
"YOU'RE BACK! YOU'RE BACK! YOU'RE BACK! YOU'RE BACK! YEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHH!"  
  
"How did you do that?" Jack marveled.  
  
"Did you do anything?" Sally asked.  
  
"Never underestimate the power of the pencil," Charon waved her notepad which contained the words:  
  
Barrel Picard lived in France in the 18th century. He died after eating a poisonous candy on Halloween. When he awoke in Halloween Town, he was able to speak English. However, every 5 milleniums, his French ancestry breaks through his English speaking shell and allows itself to breath every now and then. It only lasts for one day. One way to stop it is for Barrel to tell a lie.  
  
"I'll add more later, but right now, this'll have him speaking English for a long while." Charon nodded her head and stood back up. "Being from a seperate reality really comes in handy sometimes."  
  
"Thank you again for coming and helping us," Jack thanked Charon. "I still don't understand how asking Barrel if he was the leader helped him, though."  
  
"No problem, Mr. Skellington," Charon replied. She always tried to remember her manners around Jack, him being royalty and all. "And, in response to the second question, it was the only thing I could ask Barrel that I thought he might lie about. Try and visit me next Halloween. I need an idea for a costume."  
  
"Don't go crazy with that notebook now!" Sally mock chided the saber cat.  
  
"I would never do anything to embarrass you," Charon smiled. "Too much, anyway," she mumbled under her breath. "Is there anything else you need me to do?"  
  
"I'd like some candy!" Shock asked, raising her hand.  
  
"I'd like a radish!" Barrel requested.  
  
"What is it with you and radishes?" Lock hit Barrel with his mask.  
  
"Actually, there is something I'd like you to do....." Jack scratched his chin.  
  
****  
  
Dr. Finklestien and Jewel slowly made their way down the spiral ramp which stretched the length of the lab. Suddenly-  
  
"WOAH!"  
  
"WOAH!" A large log appeared out of nowhere in front of the pair! They tripped on it, and were sent tumbling down the ramp.  
  
They landed in a pile at the floor of the compound, the Doctor and his wife pinned down by his wheelchair.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Anyone?"  
  
"Sally?"  
  
"COME HERE!"  
  
****  
  
"How's that?" Charon showed Jack her handywork.  
  
"Very good, Charon," Jack handed the notebook to Sally.  
  
"I was expecting you to drop a ceiling rafter on them," Sally shook her head. "To make it seem more like an accident."  
  
"I was at a loss, ma'am," Charon shrugged. "I have to go now, Mom'll kill me for being gone this long."  
  
"Take care now!" Shock called after the girl.  
  
"Thank you for making me talk normal again!" Barrel waved.  
  
"Bye!" Charon made one final step out of the door. She sighed as the door shut behind her. "Why I think of stuff like this, I have no idea." 


End file.
